1.) At PFLAG support groups, like the one Sheila attends, parents of gays and lesbians often say that when their children come out of the closet, they go in. Why?

  1. ) Do you have gay or lesbian family members or friends? How would you describe your family's reaction? How might you react if one of your children, or a close friend or family member, "came out" to you as lesbian or gay?

  1. ) What are your feelings about Jenny and Tamara's ceremony? Should lesbians and gays be allowed to marry legally? Why or why not? If you were in a committed relationship with someone of your own sex, would you wish to be married?

4.) When Dan tells Sheila that she is his best friend, her unspoken response is that friends are the women she talks to about her husband. Can a husband and wife be friends? What is a friend?

  1. ) Are Sheila and Dan equal partners in their marriage? Why or why not?

6.) Sheila manipulates Dan and hides her support for their daughter's ceremony from him. Under what circumstances, if any, are such deceptions justified in a relationship?

7.) Both Jenny and Jeffrey deviated from the "script" that their parents had in mind for them: marriage to a Jewish partner of the opposite sex. Which disturbed Dan and Sheila more? Why?

8.) Sheila experiences guilt after her brief "affair" with Naomi. Would she have felt more or less guilty if she had had an affair with someone of the opposite sex? How might Dan have felt if he had known about it? Do you see a difference in an affair with a person of the same sex compared to one of the opposite sex?